Life After Divorce | The New Me Mom

Happiness…a sense of well-being, contentment, or joy.

I’m sure we could all define happiness differently and how it looks in our own lives. Your current state of happy might look different from the person sitting right next to you. But we all have a sense of happiness at some point or another.

My sense of happy has come a long way. Just a couple years ago I would have put on a “happy face” just to get through the day or through the next conversation but it wasn’t genuine. I lost the feeling of what it was like to just be in a happy place or even state of mind. I mean, I’m not sure very many people are happy in the middle of a divorce, but that’s where I was. I lost who I was as a person and almost my free will to speak in my marriage and wasn’t happy for many many years. I was truly unhappy for so long I couldn’t see what it should have been. I buried my life into my kids’ lives and that became my happy. As mom’s we all forget about ourselves at one time or another just to put the needs of theirs ahead of our own. At the time I only knew myself as a mom and nothing more. Or only saw myself as a mom and nothing more.

But lately some things have shifted…

For years my “friends” didn’t care for my husband or didn’t want to be around him so those “friends” dwindled over the years and ultimately I ended up with nothing and no solid friendships. Through the divorce years I made some really great friends that had the best of intentions and still do. The friendships only grew from there when I started trusting God more and more. That whole feeling of hitting rock bottom was how my friendships looked. Almost like God was removing them all and building me better friendships to have on the outside of my marriage and divorce. I can’t even explain the happiness I feel for these women who all take me as I am daily and who I once was. The stories that I tell of how my life once looked and how it shows my brokenness to how my life has turned around is something super beautiful that only God could have created through the pain and the messiness of my past.

Yesterday a friend from work, who I used to live next to when I was married and has honestly seen me at my worst, pulled me aside to tell me she can see how happy I am now. She says she can even hear the happy in my voice. This put the biggest smile on my face that even one person has noticed the “change” in me. I’m not sure how I look on the outside but on the inside I really am happy! Something I can say took a long time to find again. I am happy for the time I get with my kids, the alone time I’m able to have, the friendships I’ve made, for the place I get to work, and the woman I know God created me to be. I’m living life without the fear of not knowing what’s going to happen or what’s supposed to happen in the future. And I’ve been trying to remind myself not to be so serious and just live life with a fun mentality. Something I never thought I’d be able to do…It’s been quite the long road from having that pinned up anxiety, worry, and be walking on eggshells all the time to having no anxiety, laughing at the little things, smiling for the sweet moments, and just finally feeling content.

Who knew it could be this easy to just be happy! ♥️

May the God of hope fill you with all joy and peace in believing, so that by the power of the Holy Spirit you may abound in hope. Romans 15:13